My life as a feminist, as a modern Orthodox Jew, and as a sex-neutral asexual has actually allowed me to think about many old questions with more depth. Sex-positive feminism and sexual liberation are not celebrations of sexual activity, but celebrations of sexual agency.
Many generations of women have been shamed for sexual interest or activity, but many others have also been targeted for saying “no,” for being “frigid,” for not putting out. Just as we celebrate women who say “yes” to what they want, we celebrate women who say “no” to what they do not want. Sex positivity should be about what feels right—whether that means going to bed with a vibrator, a hookup, or a really good piece of garlic bread (it’s an asexual thing. If you know, you know). If there is one thing I have learned in this journey of identity and philosophy, it is that there is room for empowerment both in being sexual and in being nonsexual.
From the Lilith Blog, April 2022. Read the full article here.